You had that one moment frozen in time. The moment came and went as quick as you could blink your eye. Such a small amount of time, but the impact was immeasurable. It was that moment in time where you believed the lie. It is the lie that someone told you about yourself or how you perceived someone else’s actions and internalized it.
The thing that was said or done can feel paralyzing. How could this be? How did this happen? Their words or actions caused your heart to feel like it literally broke in half. That moment has passed, but what happened will always be.
Well, there are three ways to look at it, to perceive it, to frame it or to tell the story.
The above picture says a lot. There are three doors and we will explore three different common stories.
You walk right past door #1. It may be too easy to walk through.
Instead, you start with door #2. You walk in and see that situation and believe what you see. Door #2 says, “You are stupid and that is why it happened.” Yes YOU! You made the foolish choice and that is why it happened. You should’ve known better. Looking back the signs were there. You are smarter than that choice, but you made a decision and now look what happened! But who wants to look in the mirror and see stupid?
So let’s see what is behind door #3. You walk in and you see that situation and see that you are not enough. If you were enough it would not have happened. If you could have only been better, different, or just acted like someone else, it wouldn’t have happened. You didn’t measure up to what was expected or needed. The games continue to play in your mind and you have a hard time seeing the situation. You feel unworthy and devalued. Why do you feel that way? Is that really the truth? You feel a nudge that tells you, “You ARE enough!” You have a hard time believing it, but you walk out and then notice door #1.
Finally, you decide to walk through door #1. You knew it was there the whole time. As you walk through this door you see the situation, but you are simply observing like a fly on the wall. You can see it had little or nothing to do with you. Really? Are you sure? You seemed to play such an important role. You can see the other person/people’s actions going on even though you are not part it. It is still occurring without you there. You can see that it was happening before you got involved with that person or in that situation. You can also see that it is going on in the future. How can this be? You can now see that without you, there is still that personality, that addiction, that anger, that betrayal, that drama, that deception, that unforgivness, that abuse and what happed in that moment of time that broke your heart to begin with.
You have learned a lot from visiting the rooms, but staying in any of these rooms too long will only hold you hostage to that moment in time where you believed the lie. I would like to invite you to take a walk with me down the street. Look at all the other doors. Look at all the opportunities. Behind each one is a new experience that will continue to help you on your journey. You are seeing clearly now. You can see the truth. Keep exploring behind the doors and have fun, but choose the doors carefully.